Trying to communicate across emotional divides with someone who was socialized to be the ‘strong, silent type’ is so fucking frustrating. A lifetime of trying to fit some emotionally crippled masculine ideal means that even basic concepts of emotional intelligence are life-changing epiphanies.
You have feelings. Yes! Even you, whether your pay attention to them or not. And your feelings affect your thoughts, which can influence your behavior.
I can’t read your thoughts, man. Use your words. Tell me how you feel, and why you think you feel that way.
That tension in your limbs, that tightness in your chest, that roiling in your belly, those might be physical manifestations of your feelings. Maybe you should pay attention to that shit.
Most importantly, though, I am not responsible for helping you deal with your emotions. At least not until you’re emotionally mature enough for it to be worth my time. You carry your baggage, and I’ll carry mine.